Word Vomit

I have this energy under my skin that thrives off of anticipation and fear. That welcoming fear that pushes you to go further than you thought you could go. I get a taste of it a couple times a year and after each taste I refuse to let it go for a while and return to stillness. I grasp on to it hard like the ending of story that speaks only to me. I want it again and again.

And it’s scary. I fear the stillness will equate to laziness. So I go further, and harder, and stronger. I fear that if I don’t push forward the taste will vanish all together. And I can’t live like that. I have tried, and I know it is possible…but who’s writing my story? Me or them?

I fly on an upward euphoric spiral that takes me away from the world. And I miss them so I deflate myself and touch back down. There is no balancing that is successful, no one side that will win – I am left to struggle.

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One Response to Word Vomit

  1. Christine Aben says:

    That was an awesome piece!!! Xoxo

    Sent by Christine Aben from her iPad

    >

    Like

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