I’ve been feeling heavy hearted and tired lately. I don’t know if it’s because of this crumby weather…although ‘they’ promise it will improve this weekend in time for my daughter’s birthday party…Or if I’m stretching myself too thin with writing, drawing, kids, daycare, training for marathons….Or perhaps it’s just the training for the marathons coming up in the next three weeks…Or, or, or…
Today I witnessed an accident. I was just about to run across the street pushing two little ones in my stroller. Suddenly a black SUV swerves, smashes into another car and goes up on two wheels and moves towards us. The front of the car was basically ripped right off of the vehicle. I was able to back us up.Debris flew in our direction but thankfully missed us. I was in shock.
I remember watching the smaller vehicle and specifically looking to see if there was anyone in it besides the driver. There was a lady in the passenger seat. I zeroed in on her for some reason and watched her as she became emotional. Her arms flapped around inside the shadows of that car. She moved around like she was having a toddler’s temper tantrum. And then her hands went up to her face and her companion put his arms around her.
By the grace of God I have never been in an accident. I don’t know what that feels like. I did however, get a good taste of shock today. I waited like a good bystander to give my statement with a few others. The driver of the SUV was of course a lawyer. Actually looked almost identical to the actor Zachary Quinto. Do you know the look? Tall, dark hair, bushy eyebrows, great smile and lots to say.
Just made me think….as it does to most when we experience something that could have ended life as we know it….I’ve been heavy hearted…with less patience for my kids, less energy as normal…perhaps its some anxiety for my upcoming ‘adventures’ as I like to call all the races I run.
I’ve just got to try to keep my eye on the prize. That prize being all the beautiful, amazing moments in life I get to feel, share, experience, breathe in….It’s so easy to push harder and harder on myself…I’m determined to achieve. Absolutely determined. But part of my achievements is the happiness of my kids, my happiness, and just being.
BREATHE. AND JUST BE.